Learning the Facts of Second Life

Authored by Scott Goldberg on November 6, 2006 - 4:37pm.
Second Life PartyPart I: Broke as a Joke
As a lifelong video gamer I’m accustomed to two things (well, far more than that, but for the sake of brevity): 1) Paying for my game; and 2) Not paying a dime after accomplishing #1. So I went into this “free” game called Second Life prepared to pay something, at some point.  But the virtual “Man” held out his virtual hand far earlier than I imagined.  I was prompted to enter a credit card number and receive, in exchange, my “Linden” dollars, practically the minute I pressed the orange “Join Now” button on the homepage.  I opted not to pay, and thus entered the game naked and without a dime.

Being broke in Second Life is like being broke in First Life, so an A+ goes to Linden Lab for getting that one right.  My justification for not purchasing any Linden dollars was that, well, I can’t use those bloody things at Heirloom’s for coffee, and I can’t use them to pay for a First Life shirt (which I actually need), so why would I stock up on Linden dollars?  I’m not used to playing Monopoly with actual greenbacks, know what I mean?  I’m not buying a 2-inch x 4-inch rectangle called “Park Place” for $1,000 real dollars because, well, we all understand that we’re not buying anything at all.  That’s the fun of Monopoly.  There’s nothing really at stake.  Some people would say the reality of the Linden dollars is exactly what makes the whole thing tick, but I don’t know.  The idea of buying “virtual stuff” didn’t make enough sense to me.  And selling virtual stuff feels even more suspect.

Second Life Mansion
Expensive (virtual) real estate in Second Life

I came to realize fairly quickly that the primary purpose of Second Life is to buy and sell things.  Sure, there’s other stuff going on, and I’ll get to that in a minute, but the plain truth is that the boys at Linden Lab aren’t doing charity work.  It’s a business, and a business only works when money exchanges hands.  There’s ample opportunity to buy various things like clothes, samurai swords, couches, land, helicopters (you know, the normal stuff), but once again, even after finding many of these virtual items, I couldn’t justify paying good scratch to get something I can’t sit on, wear, drive, or fly in First Life, so what’s the point?

Anyway…the point is that I got bored pretty quickly, because, like I said, the objective of Second Life is to buy and sell things.

There it is.  Buy stuff, sell stuff, or be bored.

Well…actually…that’s not entirely true…

Part II: Where the popular kids hang out
When I first signed on there were, according to a list on the screen, 1.2 million people registered on Second Life, and at that particular moment, about 10,000 were online.  But within my first half hour, I only saw two people.  Needless to say it got pretty boring.  So I hit the search button and clicked on “Popular Places,” figuring I would definitely find the other 9,997 people that were supposedly logged on to Second Life.  Here’s the list they showed me:

Top 5 Popular Places:
  1. Club Arsheba: Hot Sexy Girls
  2. ELEMENTS at Goddess of Love 2
  3. IceDragon’s Playpen Island
  4. Odds & Ends/Club/Casino/FreebieSto...
  5. Bad Girls Dance & Fetish Club
The rest of the list – about 15 more titles – was a mix of more casinos and more sex clubs, so once again, Second Life got First Life right: if you want to find a lot of people, go to the sex clubs and casinos!

I chose Odds & Ends as a place to see what social life in Second Life was all about.

Club Arsheba Second LifeIt’s overdue that I mention the feeling of joining Second Life.  I felt like Tom Cruise’s character in Vanilla Sky, or, I guess, like the way you might feel meeting Tom Cruise at a Scientology clinic.  Either way, there was something cultish about it.  I had an option to add music to my journey, and the chosen piece at the time was a jazz piano number that you’d expect to find at the spa in Mandalay Bay.  And speaking of Vegas, there’s something very similar about Second Life and that Town-of-Towns.  You feel like you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing, which is exactly what you want to be doing, and I guess that explains why Club Arsheba: Hot Sexy Girls is the single most popular place in Second Life.

Anyhow…

At Odds & Ends Casino I noticed that I stuck out like a hobo at the Oscars.  I had elected in the beginning to not alter my appearance.  I went into the Second Life the way I came in, a white boy with a white t-shirt and jeans.  Everyone at Odds & Ends was avoiding me for that reason.  I was the guy at the Halloween party without a costume.  You look at those people for a second, trying to guess who they are, but they look back at you with an expression on their face saying, “I’m not dressed up, stop looking at me,” and you eventually realize that and feel sorry for them because the best part of Halloween is meeting complete strangers dressed as complete idiots, and so you walk away.  That’s the way it is in Second Life.

Second Life Primary Character

I had to do something fast, so I turned myself into a black man, gave myself cloud white hair and a white soul patch, put on a white tank top, took off my jeans and replaced them with tighty-whities, and rocked knee-high white socks with white fingerless gloves.  I looked like Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty, if they ever filmed a scene of him at bed time after a night at a drag club.  Suddenly, everyone wanted to chat.

“Nice tan!” someone said.

“Thanks!” I replied.  I then pressed and held the “Page Up” button and flew around the casino for a while.  That’s right, you can fly in Second Life.  In fact, that might be the catch phrase you’ll hear most often as Second Life grows.  “You can even…wait a minute…Are you listening?…Are you sitting down for this?...You can even fly.”  It didn’t take long to get bored with that too, because like I said, unless you’re buying something, you aren’t doing a thing.  And besides, is flying in a video game still a surprise?  You could fly in Super Mario Bros. II, which was released in 1988.

Part III: Slower than Sunday School
I’m demanding when it comes to the speed of digital media, and Second Life is very slow.  Painfully slow.  Alarmingly slow.  Slower than a Paul Simon concert.  Slower than Refrigerator Perry with a broken foot and a refrigerator on his back.

I’ve read glowing reviews about Second Life’s 3-D landscapes and architecture.  Well, put simply, that’s just not true, and if you play video games and have tried Second Life, you know exactly what I mean.  Sure, it’s fine, but it’s more standard than groundbreaking.  It isn’t doing anything that hasn’t been done many times before (though the precedent that it’s setting for slowness reminds me of the color printer I had for my Apple computer when I was 7).

Enough said.  Second Life is slow.  There you have it.

Part IV: Did I mention that Second Life is slow?
Here’s something I came across on a Second Life blog:

Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Good morning everyone!

Our website is going to be slow. Yahoo put us on the front page at about 6:00 am PDT.And logins are going to be slow today with the influx. Thank you for your patience as we welcome our new residents!

The responses from Second Lifers were appropriate:

Robertt Bulan Says:
More than slow... I can’t even connect. How will Linden Lab handle it when the population really explodes?

Fair point.  Here’s another one:

Muerte Valencia Says:  
CONGRATS TO LL
BUT YOU KNOW SINCE MORE PEEPS ARE COMING SINCE YAHOO POSTED SL ON THEIR SITE GUESS WHAT OLD PEEPS … IT IS LAG TIME AND SLOW TIME IN SL. AND LETS NOT FORGET THERE WILL BE MORE PROBLEMS THAN WHAT WE HAD BEFORE.  OKAY NOW START WITH ALL THE MANY UPDATES EACH WEEK AND SEE AFTER, LETS SAY, 2 MONTHS TIME IF THE POPULATION IS STILL AT 1 MILLION…I FOR ONE DOUBT IT.

Also accurate.

Anyway...as I said:  Second Life is slower than a Ben Folds concert in Second Life (which actually happened).  Try wrapping your brain around that one!

Part V: Guess what?  Avatars aren’t the only ones selling things...
Guess what else is for sale?  Linden Lab!  This is according to Daniel Terdiman’s CNET blog anyway.

And why not?  Running Second Life appears to be a huge headache.  The technology doesn’t work very well, yet somehow new “residents” keep popping up.  Now the line at Linden Lab appears to be: “Let’s get out of here before the avatars leave Second Life and come find us in our First Life sleep!”

It seems Second Life wasn’t built for the long term.  How can you grow an economy that has so much trouble accommodating new citizens?  The idea is an interesting one, but it doesn’t seem to be working right.  I’d rather drink a Tabasco milkshake through my nose than deal with Second Life’s troubles any more.

Here’s another thing: How are companies like American Apparel, Reuters, Sony, and everyone else who has dealt good cash to join Second Life going to continue justifying the investment in a place that works so poorly?  Not to mention, with so many people making friends at Archan Free Sex Community, and not a single person at the American Apparel store at the time I visited, what’s the purpose of running a legitimate business in Second Life?  Is it really that lucrative?

One day a company will figure all of this out, though, and the concept behind Second Life will be a relevant one.  For now, I’m going to kill off my avatar.

Scott Goldberg


Related Links:
Second Life Takes Off, Gains Interest of Older Generation
A Gallery of Marketing and PR in Second Life
"Second Life" Online World Creators Linden Lab Raise $11 Million
CNET: "Second Life" Members Engaging in Virtual Pedophilia Playacting
Linden Lab's "Second Life" Online Community Hits 100,000 Residents



Comments

100% correct

Mr. Goldberg's article is 100% correct.... If you feel the same as he does, then you too should "kill off" your avatar and go "drink a Tabasco milkshake through [your] nose...." Your absence from Second Life will not be noticed. Niko

You're a full-on idiot. It's

You're a full-on idiot. It's no surprise you didn't find SecondLife anything but boring, as that's what your writing (and probably your 'real' life) is, as well. If you'd studied ANY of the other people writing about Second Life you'd see you're acting like an egocentric, dimwitted fool writing an article like this.

American Apparel? Do me a favour.

Outside companies coming into SL to advertise their RL existence are not "legitimate businesses", they're PR stunts. The AA shop is generally only visited by journalists now, who all say "oh wow there's nobody here". Why would anyone go more than once? The "concept behind SL" is not to sell ad space, you know. I am also not quite seeing why would it bother you to buy a few L$ to start off with when you're "accustomed... to paying for (your) game" before you even start. You don't get to do fancy things in WoW without either (a) spending a lot of time killing stuff or (b) going on eBay, and you have to pay up front for that too. And let's not even talk about There. It is laggy at the moment though.

Great fact checking in this piece of "journalism"

It would be nice if you got some facts straight, or even bothered to really check: (1) Second Life is not a game. It is a virtual world who's primary use is entertainment, however, there are many businesses (such as my real-life company) that use it for Corporate Training. (2) Games don't have their content created by those who inhabit them. Just about everything in Second Life is created by it's residents, most of whom are not professionals. This is going to make it much more creative an imaginative, however, not being professional can also lead to performance issues. (3) Games store 99% of the content they use on the local hard drive of the player. Second Life streams just about everything. Transferring so much more across the Internet makes it a completely different animal. Of course it's going to be a bit slower. By the way, I hear Ultima II has a great framerate on modern hardware, if that's your only concern. Many of us are more concerned about meeting fun, smart people and seeing their incredibly imaginative creations instead of the frame rate of some predictable first person shooter. (4) The popular places list is a poor indicator of popularity. If you had done some research, you would have found plenty of forum posts, blogs, and articles about the gaming of the metric used to rank places called "traffic." Camping chairs and dance pads are in place to make places appear popular, when in fact, they're just zombie avatars. (4) You claim you entered the world naked, and without a dime. That is completely untrue; all avatars are born clothes with a male or female default. There's a full library of free content provided to start in inventory made by some of the best content creators within the world. There are also tons of places where you can get more free stuff: the GNUbie Store in Indigo, YadNi's Junkyard, and www.SLBoutique.com/free/ - did you even bother using any function of the FIND tool other than the popular places tab? Sheesh, way to dig deep. (5) The company that makes Second Life is LINDEN LAB, not LINDEN LABS! Please be more responsible in your journalism. It's hard to write something decent when your entire premise is incorrect. Regards, -FlipperPA

Boring is as Boring Does

SL is boring in that way that playing the first level of any video game or reading the first chapter of a book over and over again is boring. If you never get beyond being a newbie you never find out what is really compelling about SL. You have to get past the alienness of a 3d virtual world that doesn't tell you what your purpose is. Then you start to realize that you make your own purpose. Also, I think if you aren't a creative person, you don't use photoshop, can get into scripting, or don't enjoy putting together 3 dimensional primitives to make your own whatever, then 90% of the fun is lost on you. Sure money counts, but c'mon you live in the US of A. What can you do anymore that doesn't cost you? I hear they are taxing air by the lung full next year. Once you get out of newbie stage, part of the fun of SL is also figuring out how to make money and that is a little more sophisticated than mining for gold and fending off monsters. Perhaps that first commentor wasn't entirely correct, Second Life, like first life, can be very much a game it all depends on how you tackle it. As I always say to people who protest that they are bored "maybe you're just boring."

What the?

You have no clue. There are so many factual inaccuracies in this report that I wonder if you made it some personal goal to see how many falsehoods you could fit in one article.

Re: What the?

Incredulous: Please elaborate. Thanks, Scott Goldberg

Oh, I get it...

"Sponsored by Cdigix". So you are paid to trash anything that looks like competition to your masters!

I agree

I think it's hilarious the backlash you're getting for this piece. My experience was practically identical to yours. I think this community is better left to those with a lot of free time in their first life to really garner the enjoyment of it.

What a shallow article

I am compelled to write after reading this poor article. It sounds like you were in for about 2 hours. The landscape is VAST, believe me. You would never get to see it all (and not that you would want to anyway) but the variety is amazing! This large landscape means people are spread around. Were you expecting them all in one place?? Check the map out, you can see little green dots showing where people are concentrated. Of course Linden Lab is out to make money, they don't claim that they are not. And many residents are as well. Good luck to them. It's all optional, you're never forced to buy. As someone said, you start off with clothes and a large library of other clothes, along with MANY ways of adjusting your appearance. And of course there are free places. When you register, you have the option of entering your credit card details, or not - it's up to you. If you DO enter them, they will give you a $250 start-up pot - cool. I have been a regular in SL since April 2006 and I have not spent once cent in there. This doesn't mean I will not in the future, of course, as you do need to spent money to own land. A cheaper alternative is to rent a house. I was lucky to register when they had a scheme where they gave me $50 every week (as long as I was in the world at least once in that week). They continue to honour that commitment and I have bought lot's of cool stuff with it. Unfortunately they don't do that for new users any more. You can go to dance clubs where owners sometimes randomly award money to people, just for coming, or providing entertaining conversation or dancing well (as judged by contestants). There are also money chairs, but they're rubbish as far as I am concerned - boring and a waste of time. Apparently there are money trees to find in some places but I have not bothered. I have made use of the above mentioned library and free things. I could build things but do not have time - the tools are all built in and free for anyone to use. There are also free classes you can attend at virtual universities to learn to build things. I have found that many people are very generous once you get to know them. Someone gave me a very nice looking replacement skin, and other nice clothes. I also hang out at friend's houses as if they are my own. Most people are friendly and helpful. There are mentors in the welcome areas quite often and this is where I recommend you hang out to start with. There is also Live Help where you can be connected with an in-world expert if you really get stuck. For me, it's all about meeting people and socialising. It is NEVER boring, now that I have established friends (who I would love to meet in RL one day). Whenever I go on-line, I find myself chatting with between 2 and 6 people simultaneously. Last night I was mud wrestling, then slow dancing with a nice friend. Then I went to a library and finally to my favourite place in SL, the Lost Garden's of Apollo. There are beaches and water parks, forests and amusement parks, you can go skiing, skydiving, ten pin bowling, movie cinemas showing RL current movies (ahem). You can even have a music jam with your friends in an Elven world. There are interesting mock-ups of real world places to visit and hang out at. Each place has its own music stream and there are video streams in many places too. There are lot's of multi-player quiz based games (where you can win money) and many other types too - even saw Russian Roulette (btw, you cannot die in SL). The list of interesting things to do in SL is endless. To find nice places, don't look in the Popular Places area in Find, look in people's 'Picks' within their personal profiles. Then Instant Message them and ask them to tell you about them - that'll get a friendly conversation going. SL does slow down some times and it certainly can be frustrating, but I balance this with the fact that I have paid nothing for all the fun I've had and the friends I've made - exceptional value as far as I'm concerned. Basically, your first impressions cannot count as a judgement of the world as a whole. You need to give it some time, to get over that awkard newbie period, that we have all faced.

No D00d, it's not TV

If you want to be entertained, watch TV. If you want to play a game, then find a game to play. If you want to participate in something social and creative, then enter Second Life, but be prepared: you need to work at it - shock! just like real life :-)

Interesting article although

Interesting article although I do kind of agree it is a touch shallow. Honestly, to enjoy second life you HAVE to get some money, without it you miss out on a lot of cool stuff. Buy a Dominus Shadow and you get a real taste of how cool the content in SL can be. Popular places are also to be avoided, you really have to explore to find the cool stuff, although a "seen it all" feeling sets in pretty quickly. Very true about the slowness, not even amazing gaming computers can run SL well. Worse is that the slowness is also present in other stuff, scripts run very slowly for example, thankfully that will be drastically improved in six months or so. There is still fun to be had, you just have to work and pay to find it.

I agree

I agree that Sl is just a Compensation for what people are missing out on in RL, although there are Profitable values in SL i believe that Sl is just bullshit. wow you can go skiing in SL, but do you feel the cold breeze in your face and the Adrenaline of going down slopes like in RL? NO!. omg you can FLY! Correction, a virtual pixelated render is what appears to be flying in a fake world. holy crap you can even make friends! but realy you are hiding behind a Computer screen, playing an avatar that probably doesnt look like you. the only benefits from SL i have seen so far, is the trade opportunities for people who arent properly trained, other than that its just compensation for what people are to scared, lazy or incapable to do!

Second Life is slow indeed.

Second Life is slow indeed. Maybe we need faster computers. Anyway, the graphics solicit my processor a lot. I guess that's why it moves in frames. I was surprised to see a Maytag Parts store in the game. I entered, browsed their products and a virtual seller told me I can buy anything I see and like online. Is this secure? What happens if I give my credit card info?

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